A gift!

Hum: Hey
Tum: Hello! Hows u?
Hum: Am ok.. you know what, today is my friend's birthday. Am thinking of getting him some nice gift.. Suggest something na..
Tum: hmm.. How about a watch?
Hum: He already has one
Tum: A tie or cufflings?
Hum: He doesnt wear or use them
Tum: hmm.. then Some books or CD?
Hum: So boring.. cant you think of anything innovative? I want to give him something that lasts for a lifetime..
Tum: Ok, Then get him a life insurance policy!! ;-)
Hum: !!!!!!!

Cheeni kum?! :-)

Image taken from : http://www.farrisliterary.com/Cookbook_CoverII.jpg

Recipe books! Whenever I see one, I groan.

Believe me, I hate cooking, be it boiling water or preparing a full course meal.

Many of them say that recipe books are the best thing that couldn't happened to people like me.. but then, i find them so wrong.. The problem is not that I cant cook, but just that I'm too lazy
to be stuck in the kitchen cooking up delicacies to reach people's hearts through their stomachs! ;-)

And talk about recipe books..

Exact measures never ever seem to work! oh come on... moms never go by them and yet how great their preparations turn out to be..
Just incomparable! And what's amazing is how they always know how much of sugar to add to the jamun, "a little more than 2 cups.."

"Don't worry! once the dish gets boiled, the quantity will reduce by itself.."

Or how just another pinch of salt would make the most delicious of pulaos..

or even how half a second extra boiling can make the rice semi solid..

I've never seen mom follow the instructions in any cookbook... the '2 teaspoons of butter' always becomes 'half of this little cup.. 2 spoons will be too less', all this while I just look on in wonder!!!

Hmmm..!! guess the only way I can reach that state of 'Perfection' is by spending hours and hours in the kitchen, burning my fingers and a few err.. dishes too! ;-)

Well.. That's my outlook on cooking and recipe books.. Anyways, On another note.. here's wishing all of you a great year 2009.. May this be a fulfilling year for you and may all your dreams come true.. :-)

Giftooo giftu...!

Gone are those days when people were anxious to know what gifts they got. Nowadays its all about hoping that the unwanted gifts don't exceed the storage space at your home.
There are 3 broad categories when it comes to gift 'items':
* Innovative types : Only 5% belong to this category. They know your tastes, they know how usable it is to you, they know that the chances of someone else gifting the same item are slim.
* Ganesha types : If I were Lord Shiva or Vishnu, I would have cursed the entire humanity for how I am ignored when it comes to gift items. A typical conversation of a couple goes about like this:
Husband: We have to go to that wedding in the evening.
Wife: What gift shall we buy?
Husband: Some Ganesha gift item of course.
Wife: (smiling) Of course! (What else?)
65% of the people fall under this category. Ganesha has got great range, he comes in all forms - from the most artistic to highly innovative to funny to absolutely ridiculous. My friend has a collection of over 150 Ganeshas - dancing, playing music, sitting, standing, sleeping, programming - you name it, we have it. So every time someone gives a Ganesha, its mostly the one you already have. Or even worse, you get two pieces of the same variety on the same day.
I love you Ganesha, but bring on the Hanumans, Ayyappas, and Gajalakshmis please!
* Clock types : No occasion is complete without a few unusable clocks being gifted. 40% of the people fall under this category as well.
I am seriously planning to have one of living room walls as a "clock wall" and hang all the clocks that we got, each one set to the time zone of a different country.
Those of you who must be wondering why the percentages are not adding up properly, Its just that I'm weak in maths and also 10% of the people actually gift clocks with Ganesha on them! ;-)
And by the way, If you are not the innovative types when it comes to gifts, better stick to giving cash. You will be really appreciated.
There are many varieties in the cash givers as well and each one may belong to one of more of these categories:
* Anonymous : There will always be a few who do not write their names on the gift covers. May be because they are the "i-don't-want-to-be-discovered-of-giving-so-less" type. The rest belong to the very old thinking that even writing their names on the covers amounts to showing off.
* Cover less Anonymous : Among the gift covers, you will at least find a note given by someone who just slipped it into your hands while offering a handshake. May be these are the ones who paid an unexpected visit, had no gift cover, at the same time did not
wish to go gift less.
* The Plus One Rupee types : They will never ever give you money without a one rupee coin along with the gift amount. One logic I have heard from them is that "plus one" means continual growth. The gift value only has to be 51, 101 and so on.
The funny thing about this is, may be 50 years ago one rupee was still a decent gift amount, now to think of it.. whats the value of a rupee anyways..

So, what have your observations been when it comes to giving and receiving gifts? :-)

Law can be so dumb??!

Came across this list on a forwarded message and was totally amused ! Made some additions to this list ( authentic, of course, I double checked online) and sharing it here. Read on:
England
* A Member of Parliament must not enter the House of Commons wearing a full suit of armour.
* Committing suicide is classified as a capital crime – punishable by death. (Duhh...)
* Sticking a postage stamp, bearing the Queens portrait, upside down on an envelope is an act of treason.
France:
* It is illegal to kiss on railways. (Is it acceptable everywhere else?)
* Pigs must not be called Napoleon.
Italy:
* A man may be imprisoned for wearing a skirt. ( uh ho. No prob.. Just skip on to Scotland!)
Singapore:
* A person convicted of littering three times, will have to clean the streets on Sundays wearing a sign saying "I am a litter lout."
South Korea:
* Traffic police are required to report all bribes that they receive from motorists. ( report the bribe and then slip it into the pocket? ;))
Victoria:
* In Victoria only licensed electricians may change a light bulb.
* In Victoria it is illegal to wear pink pants after midday on a Sunday. (Who would want to wear pink pants anyways?)
Alabama:
* Driving a vehicle while blindfolded is prohibited.
Arkansas:
* It is forbidden for a man to beat his wife more than once a month (Once a month is justified?? Huh)
New York:
* A man greeting another by “placing the end of his thumb against the tip of his nose and wiggling the extended fingers of that hand." Will be arrested for disorderly conduct. :-)

Thought for today!

There was a time when I thought hardwork and dedication at any cost were my life’s principles.
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This was before I met money! ;-)

Periyavaa sonna Perumal sonna maadhiri..

Okie for all those non tamizh speaking folks out there, this post would be like watching a French movie with subtitles.. ;-) Anyways, what does the title mean ? It goes like this.. “When elders give you an advice, its as though GOD himself is doing it.” (Alright mom, I know the translation is pathetic! )

Here's a list of things that my mom, Patti and others told us when we were kids and they continue to do it even now..

• You are not supposed to cut your nails after 6 in the evening.
• When someone sneezes when you are about to leave your house, you have to sit down and drink a glass of water (Now don’t ask me why)
• When you see a cat cross the road , you are supposed to stop right there for a second and then start walking again.
• You should not whistle during the night. It seems whistling during the night invites thieves.. (Yeah right!)
• You are not supposed to lie down or sleep during the 'velakku aethara neram' (roughly translates to 'The time when lamp is lit in front of god')
• You shouldn't sit on a pillow. Thalagani maela okkaandha kandan varum. (Now you know the reason behind the recession in America!)

The list is just endless.. Though we all know these things made no sense, we still followed it being scared of the consequences or not wanting to hurt their sentiments. We followed every rule because Periyavaa Sonna Perumal Sonna Maadhiri.. :-)

Of books and their titles..!

I have a feeling that authors spend more time in coming up with a catchy title for their book than spending time on writing the book itself. One example that comes to my mind is 'The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari'.. Most of the reviews for the book have been quite critical and I fail to understand how this book has been in the limelight. I even heard that Tamil comedian Vivek presented this book to former President Abdul Kalam.

Anyways, on a lighter note.. Here are some funny/unique book titles that i came across..

*How to kill your husband (and other handy household hints) by Kathy Lette

* When Your Phone Doesn't Ring, It'll Be Me by Cynthia Heimel

* Women Are from Venus, Men Are from Hell by Amanda Newman

* If God was a Banker by Ravi Subramanian

*How to Write a How to Write Book by Brian Paddock

So, How many such names can u remember? :-)

Marriage and all that Jazz! :-)

I had attended a friend's wedding a few days back and it only makes me wonder as to who would the mastermind
be behind creating something like a marriage and all things attached to it... Dont get me wrong but certain customs
and traditions in weddings just get me laughing my guts out..

So, it all began with the early morning wedding rituals.. People generally speak from the bride's point of view.. but coming to think of it, its the groom who is in a pathetic state comparitively.. How else could one explain the logic of the kanyadhaanam or the mangalya dhaaranam ceremonies where the bride would be dressed in beautiful sarees like the 'madisar' and our poor groom gets to wear a ridiculously translucent panchakajam and a pancha paathram in front of him carry on the traditions.. :-)

Utmost attention is given to the bride's make up to make her look divine and beautiful on her special day but
all that the groom gets is a 'pattai' on his forehead or a 'dhrishti pottu' that ensures he looks pathetic..

Every man finds his wife absolutely gorgeous in the wedding saree.. However i'm still waiting for some girl to
tell me that she finds her husband looking stunning in his pancha kajam and vibhoodhi pattai.. ;-)

Next was the reception where the bride and groom were trying hard to smile at every tom, dick and harry wishing them.
They would be wishing the couple saying, "Do bring him/her home sometime" apart from wishing them a happy married life.. Just imagine, even if the bride and groom visit one family a weekend, they would be atleast 80 years old by the time they visit all the well wishers!!

And yes! how can we forget the tradition of women gifting 'blouse pieces' along with the thaamboolam to the women who attend the wedding.. Poor men, They usually get nothing, The lucky ones however might get something like a hand kerchief..
And if u are a girl and belong to the close family of the bride/ groom, you are entitled to a saree and men get a lousy 'shirt piece' (Usually a white with blue stripes or a beige coloured one) in this case too!

Hmm.. It sure is a woman's world out there.. ;-)

Kaikeyi..!

Why dont people name their daughters Kaikeyi or Draupadi?
Its sad.. but history has ruined some lovely names.. what say? ;-)

Reasons to love work! ;-)

Here are 5 Reasons i Just love my work for.. ;-)

* http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g2/rainmaker.htm
* http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g3/bells.htm
* http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g3/dog.htm
* http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g3/starry.htm
* http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g3/tea.htm

Rajnikanth!

Babban, This one's specially for you.. ;-)

(Click on the Picture to enlarge)

Passing thought..!

In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills? ;-)

Pet craze!

Conversation at office today:

Me : Hello, How are you?
Colleague 1 : I'm fine. Thank you. So, What did you do over the weekend?
Me : Oh, I had gone to Regents park. It was a beautiful place. Had a good time..
Colleague 1 : Oh, Thats nice.. I was at home but the coming weekend is going to be a busy one.. My sister and her husband want to go out over the weekend and i will be going to babysit their dogs!
Me : Sorry??
Colleague 1 : I said i will be going to babysit their dogs.. They have 2 cute Dalmations and they cant be left alone at home u see..!!
Colleague 2 : Oh, Thats lovely! So are the dogs coming over or you will be going there?
Colleague 1 : No.. I'll be going there and staying there for 2 days.. Okie, Catch u later.. Got to get ready and leave early.. They'll be waiting for me..

Me (To myself): Who? Your sis or the Dogs?? :-)

Love Triangle??!!

What happens when 2 women are in love with the same man?
There is bound to be jealousy... And what if the two women share the same name, the same spaces and sometimes even the same kitchen? Arguments? Competition?

So, how exactly can the man play the balancing act?
He would like to believe that he is treating both of them fairly. He loves both the women in different ways. However, sometimes one relationship may take a back seat over the other due to the time-span of the relationship and vice versa. But definitely he would have his preferences...

And how about the women?
From their point of view, the object of either’s love is same but the degree, totally different... And these two women love the man too much to blame him, so the blame goes entirely on the other woman in his life. And that is when the conflict begins and the man gets pulled into it whether he likes it or not.

Problem problem...

A little bit of intelligence could sort this out easily...
1. They should have the basic understanding that neither of them hates the other
2. Space- to each other – Hey! Be practical. The guy cannot always take only you out for shopping or some function- both of you can join him during some of the occasions...
3. Sportsmanship – Come on! Be a sport- one of you HAS to be second. Both of you can’t be equally good at everything – be it cooking his favorite dish or being his listening ear or being his best friend…
4. Times do change – you could be or would have been in the other’s shoes some time or the other…

Oh yeah! I completely forgot to mention one more thing... The 2 women I’m talking about here are the Mother-in-Law and the Daughter-in-Law! ;-)

Kurangilirundhu...

How i wish someone gave me a treat like this one.. he he.. It sure is some BIG monkey business!! :-)

The Bengalooru Slanguage!

If you are dying to learn the latesht Bangalore street slang but do not know how, look no further I say! For here is a compilation of latest slang words in Kanglish for you! :-)

Adjushtu: adjust. Most important word that originates from the nature of all Bangaloreans.
"Solpa adjusht maadi saar."
"Sir one more banana buying means it will adjusht within 10 rupees."

Bombaat : Fantastic, excellent. "Aye hows your car doing?" "Oh bombattagide."

Chindi Chitranna : Lit: Fantastic flavoured rice. Fantastic job.
"En haadidaane.. Chindi chitranna bidu".

Da : Term of address for friends or younger people (borrowed from Tamil). Rude when used in a non affectionate sense or with strangers. Fem: di.
"What da, where all u went yesterday?"

Escapu : General departure. "Naan oota maadbittu escape aagtheeni, don't mind."

Free kotre phenoylu kudithaane : Lit: If its free, he'll even drink phenoyl.
A very economical person.

Goobe : Lit: Owl. Stupid person. "ei goobe, yaar ninge license kottiddu?"

Hengythe myge? : Lit: How does your body feel now? i.e, I'm going to beat you black and blue. "Yenu? Dhuddilvaa? Hengythe myge?"

Will sure add a few more slangs in my coming posts..
Till then, Camaan I say.. Jai kannada! ;-)

My Blog.. My Space..

Just came across this interesting page and this one recently.. People out on a mission for sure.. one of them struck by Cupid and the other asking their readers to vote and decide where they should be staying.. Believe it or not, 4963893 people actually voted!! he he...

Way to go i say! ;-)